7 steps to dealing with the fear of starting to live your dream


Posted by Israelmore Ayivor on 30th July 2013.

Fear, according to someone’s interpretation is “False Impressions Appearing Real” (F.E.A.R). This is a true expression of the fears that prevents people from releasing their true potentials in life. However, the word “fear” could have many other interpretations that could be related to different concepts. According to the Oxford Advance Learner’s Dictionary, fear “is the bad feeling that you have when you are in danger, when something bad happen or when a particular thing frightens you”. This tells that “fear” in a general term is a bad attitude and could be exhibited before, during and after an adventure.

People cannot start living their true dreams because of fear and this means as long as that fear is not dealt with, they will remain dreamers but not dream workers. They express their fears in statements like; “I am not sure this will succeed”, “what if it couldn’t work?”, “my master will be angry”, “I am not yet qualified” etc. That is a real fear. In the parable of the talents, Jesus Christ taught about how fear makes a person not to use his or her talents. In that parable, all the people who were given talents made the best use of them except this man who confessed; “….I was afraid and went and hid your talent in the ground…” Matthew 25v25. Can you see the fear in this man? He feared to optimize the talents his master gave him because he was afraid of the circumstances he would find himself in if he should not make interests on his talents because his master was a “strict master”. This was truly a “false impression appearing real” in his mind.

You can do great things when you start. Every great ending had a humble beginning. But the beginning seems to be more difficult than the continuation. What makes people who dream about great things not to be able to start living their dreams? Why are all your thoughts sitting in the ink of the paper while they should be standing in the shoes of passion and be walking on the plans of action? These seven (7) basic steps will give you a concise exposure to do what you feared to begin;

 1.    Be fully convinced about what you want to do:

The basic source of passion towards following the path to a decision made is to be well assured that what you are about to do is truly supported by God. If you are not fully convinced, there is absolutely no conviction. If you are convinced about the goals ahead, you are likely to conquer;

  • The fear of not being instantly good at doing things.
  • The fear of being left stranded due to impending obstacles.
  • The fear of staying too long on the unaccomplished task
  • The fear of the unknown.

However, if you eventually conquer the fear of starting something, you will automatically swerve the torments of the “fear of the unattempted”. This is the kind of fear that can make you worry about what you have not yet done, especially if you see someone doing it. It is a source of enviousness, a bad attitude that makes poor leaders fail. Ensure that you have an encounter with the source of your visions (Jehovah) and you will be convinced to start without fears.

 2.      Start in a small way:

If you always want to dream big and start big, you are likely to give up because of unexpected results that will haunt your dream plans. It is either you don’t start at all and suffer from the fears of the unattempted or you start in a little way and conquer it. You must however know that it is one thing starting small and continuing in that small way over a long period and starting small, growing big and reaching high. People who start small and cannot excel higher also have many sorts of factors affecting them among which the fear of failing can be traced.

If you want to remain progressively on tract, you got to believe that risk taking must become the rest of your passion because you are leaving the known into the unknown things. Make big plans, but dissociate them into chew-able stuffs that can help you to reach higher heights with little steps.

 3.       Find no flimsy excuse:

There are three kinds of people who have not yet started doing what they want to do;

  • Those who have not yet thought of what they should do,
  • Those thought of it but do not have the plans to do it,
  • Those who made the plans and kept them on the paper.

They all have one thing in common and that is to simply say, they have not started doing anything yet. If a dream will find its due course, it got to find its due paths. But excuses from people who are not likely to succeed are the main barriers on the paths of the dreams. If you are going to live the dreams you dream about you must not be a chronic giver of excuses. If you think most of your excuses are real, you are not right because majority of them stem up from the fear of acting. A person who is shy, when called to join an evangelism team to preach to people many say; “I have lectures today”. A further investigation will reveal that she does not really have lectures at that moment, but the fear of action had nailed her to give such an excuse. If you don’t find a passion for your dreams, you will find excuses. If you refuse to let excuses bind you, you will reach your desired dreams.

4.       Believe that going back is difficult than climbing on:

It is more dangerous to descend on a mountain with backward steps than to climb up. When you have this thought in mind, you will face the task ahead than thinking of quitting. When you start enjoying the benefits of what you do, you will remember the power of starting. Take a step of trial and you will ever wish to be taking that step. However it is not guaranteed that success is in the first attempt. First attempts just like any other attempt can easily fail. But it takes your focus on the success of a successful step and the torment of going back to keep you on track no matter what makes the first attempt to fail. The fact that some people are doing what they decided to do is a proof that you can also succeed only if you start. Never give up.

5.      Have a focus on the destination:

It is very easier if you set your mind on the destination of your journey than musing over the beginning. If you see yourself gone, your attitude will be tuned to taking action. If you fear the future, you are likely to remain in the present state. However, the future is brighter depending on the dreams you have for it. Why not dream brighter dreams and avoid the fear of losing a reputable future. By the dreams, you establish your future and by the actions you take, you migrate into it.

Think about the dreams you dream and never let the thoughts of the dangers of starting haunt you. Be sure you are taking the right steps because right steps lead to right destinations. Don’t allow the thoughts of your mind to contradict the plans on your paper. It is one thing putting it on paper that you are going to start and another thing to think that it is not going to be possible. When it goes that way, your mind rules over the plans you made.

6.      Be radical and dare to do it:

Excellence is never an accident. Success is never luck. If you really want to do what you want to do, you got to dare. Daring means, you stand firm and bold, courageous and passionate enough to persist and try hard to win. People who dare always press hard onto reaching the target. They make every attempt to lose the sight of fearful obstacles and deliberately plan to conquer what is the most difficult thing they had ever faced.

Every radical attempt has risks. People who achieve are moved by passion to dare and they are not people who easily complain of suffering and tiredness. They are prepared to face the risk if it comes and that is the only way out. You can’t sit down in the mess of fear and think you will sail though with success.

7.      Affirm positively:

Positive affirmations are positive things we say about ourselves that can make us to develop passion towards our goals. It is believed that what you frequently say about yourself goes a long way to create a specific image about you. Your self-esteem shows how you see yourself to be and what you know you can do with what you have. On the tongue lies the power of life and death, says the scripture. What you say about yourself as a beginner can drive away all fears of starting to move with your dreams.

Avoid claiming you are not good enough to be a success. Stop making statements like “I am a failure”, “I can’t do it”, “It is difficult for me”, “I am poor”, I am not qualified”, etc. Tell yourself that you have the power to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that you can ever think of because it’s God’s Holy Spirit who works in you.



People who do not do something because of the fear of beginning it remain doing nothing. However their refusal to do something because of their fears does not mean that the fear is gone. It means, it will graduate into something else. When the fear of not starting cripples you until it dealt with you very well, you suffer from the “fear of the unattempted” as you begin to accuse yourself for the things left undone.” When you see someone doing what you know you could have done better, you end up becoming bitter within yourself. When your bitterness is in aid of self-accusation, you will eventually develop low self-image; but when the bitterness is related to the other progressing friend, you end up becoming jealous.

Bitterness, jealousy and low-self-esteem are all bad attitudes that can ruin your life. Unfortunately the harm of “fear” is greater than them all. Deal with your fears and live life so well.


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  4. Turning the Unturned (Top 10 leadership laws)
  5. Dunamis, a dynamic power to cause change (series 1)

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